c/depression·Posted by u/jade_c·1h ago
Why do compliments bounce right off me while one criticism sticks for days?
My manager said my report was really clear on Thursday in the hallway by the printer. I said thanks and by the time I sat down I could not remember the exact words, only that it had been pleasant and then gone. Friday someone pointed out a typo in a different doc in Slack, one missing letter in a heading. I replayed that message until I fell asleep. I can still see the timestamp. The report compliment has no timestamp in my head at all. This is an old pattern and I am tired of it. I am not fishing. I am trying to understand why the good one has no grip and the small correction has claws. I even opened Slack again this morning like it might have changed. It had not. Does anyone else keep the sting and lose the nice sentence, and did anything actually make the nice one stay put?
Peer discussion on askDr.app. Not therapy and not a substitute for professional care.
4 comments
Log in to comment.
u/sophie_lang1h ago
I write the nice ones in my notes app because my brain deletes them. The mean ones I do not need to write down. They file themselves.
u/daniel_cho1h ago
The Slack timestamp thing is so real. I screenshot the good ones now, which feels vain, but otherwise they evaporate by lunch.
u/maya_patel59m ago
Has it always been this lopsided, or did it get worse when you started feeling low? Mine got worse. The printer hallway compliments used to last an afternoon.
u/chris_moretti57m ago
I asked a coworker to tell me in writing. Not because I need praise. Because spoken ones vanish and I need something I can look at later when Slack is loud.