How do I enjoy a good date without already planning how it ends?

We had tacos Thursday. She was funny. I was funny. Then somewhere between the second taco and the bill I started tracking whether this was the last easy night. I watched her face for the beginning of done. She was talking about her brother's dog. I missed half of it because I was already writing the breakup in case I needed it later. I walked her to the train and said this was great in a voice that sounded like I was already leaving. She texted when she got home. I still lay in bed running the evening like a tape for clues. I wanted to be in the taco. I was in the ending. How do you stay in the good hour without building the exit?

Peer discussion on askDr.app. Not therapy and not a substitute for professional care.

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u/maya_patel 9h ago
I pick one sensory thing to stay with. The lime on my fingers, the noise of the place. Sounds fake. It is the only thing that keeps me in the booth.
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u/theo_ramirez 8h ago
Same with concerts. I ruin the second song by wondering if we will still go to these next year.
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u/sam_whitaker 8h ago
Do you tell her you drifted, or do you just go quiet and hope she does not notice?
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u/nora_klein 7h ago
I leave my phone in my pocket the whole meal now. Checking it was how I started writing the ending early.
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