c/personality·Posted by u/chris_moretti·1h ago

When people call me stubborn, am I actually just protecting a boundary?

My roommate wanted to host people Thursday. I'd already said weeknights are no for me because I have early shifts. He asked again in the hallway, smiling, like I just needed a little push. I said no again, same words. He called me stubborn and went into his room. I stood there replaying it. Was I being rigid? Thursday isn't sacred. I could've put in headphones. But I'd already given the answer, and the second ask felt like he thought the first one was a warm-up. This happens at work too. I pick a way to do a task, someone wants to redo the plan, and I hold. Sometimes I'm wrong and should move. Sometimes I hold because I can feel myself getting walked over if I don't. From the outside it probably looks the same. I don't want to be the guy who never bends. I also don't want every no to be a negotiation. How do you tell stubborn from just keeping your word to yourself?

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